Thursday, February 12, 2009

No Broad Unifying Theme

No, today you get two small vaguely related themes largely inspired by Facebook chats I've had today.

First and foremost, I have big plans for tomorrow. I can't divulge the precise nature of these plans because that would be unlucky (also, I suspect Matt is a saboteur). However, for good luck, I've devised the following ritual:

  • Open an umbrella indoors while standing beneath a ladder.
  • Lob a black cat into a mirror, shattering it.
  • Have the mirror shards knock over a bottle of salt.
Madness? THIS. IS. HUNTER!

It's my broader strategy known only as the Three Stooges Effect. I believe that there are limited avenues for bad luck, like a doorway to a building. Most people with bad luck invoke it slowly and the bad luck can enter their doorway in a neat and orderly fashion. But by invoking as much bad luck as possible, all of the bad luck gets stuck as they try to enter the door at the same time. Thus, no bad luck at all.

Now, when President Obama is constantly mentioning how this is the "worst financial crisis since the Great Depression", I am easily tempted to mock him. After all, he was supposed to be all about the politics of "hope". But then I thought about the real politics of fear. Here is a sample:
This is the worst financial crisis in history. Every day when I wake up, I consider myself fortunate to find the masses are not hunting each other down in a cannibalistic orgy of poverty.




Aside from both topics occurring in facebook chat, I'm afraid I have no unifying conclusion.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wait, didn't you get that idea of the doorway from the Simpsons?

Hunter Barry said...

The Simpsons have done everything. Also, no clip existed to cite the source.