Blogathon Day Ten: Half Marathon Post-Mortem. Or is it a Post-Marathon Half Mortem?

It's been a half week since the half marathon, so I figure this is the most fitting time to do a post-mortem on the race and wrap up my coverage of the Country Music Marathon.

Biggest Mistake: I definitely made some missteps on nutrition the day of the race. Mostly, I brought entirely too much with me. I used all three shot bloks I had (which is, incidentally, one serving), but I only used one of the elctrolyte pills, one of the Gu's (because the the plural of Gu can't be Gus, that's a name), and maybe two of the fig newtons. I didn't even touch my power bar until after the race was over and even then it was just to make sure my keys were still in my pocket. It's not a mistake I regret making. I didn't want to hit the wall and have nothing up my sleeve. That would've been a disgraceful way to end the race and would have cast a pall over the entire half marathon experience.

Proudest Moment: I'm not going to say "crossing the finish" line for two reasons. One, it is cliche and everyone says that. Two, as you could tell from the video, I was strictly business when I crossed the finish line. My proudest moment was when I got the medal shortly after crossing the finish line and I realized that I had really done it. To paraphrase Lonely Island "This ain't Sea World, this is as real as it gets. I ran a Half Marathon, don't you ever forget!"

Biggest Surprise: The biggest surprise would be how many people I had to pass during the race. Part of this would happen naturally since my strategy left brief windows for nearby slowpokes to pass me. But I did not expect to pass nearly as many people as I did (since passing people was something that never came up during training). The downside is I may have rubbed elbows with people in entirely the wrong way near the end. I'm starting to suspect people might exaggerate their corral time so they can leave sooner. It's a smart move really. Get more of your run taken care of before the day truly begins. It's not like there's a bonus prize for beating your corral time. If there is, then I did not receive it on the race day and would like to inquire how I might claim my prize.

Second Biggest Surprise: That would have to be Miles 9.5 through 12.5 simply because any specific details about that stretch of road would be a surprise to me. I sincerely do not remember what happened there besides the fact that it was starting to get hot and there was no shade except for a few bridges. Special shout out goes to Sharon Perry for bringing a cold towel to me (and a rousing speech) as I passed Mile 9. The towel helped a lot, but mostly I appreciate having a clear reminder of what was happening during Mile 9.

Bin Laden stole my Blogging Thunder

Well, here I was all ready to talk about my experiences with the half marathon when Bin Laden was confirmed to be dead as a doornail. I'll still talk about the marathon and post what few pictures there are, but I feel it would be negligent to ignore the issue. Some of my peers have called this one of the biggest events of the modern day, others have said that it changes nothing. While I'm not sure if it'll be one of the biggest events in modern history, it is a gargantuan event now. Even if you ignore Bin Laden's role in the leadership and organization of terrorist activity, he was still a major symbol of defiance against the United States. His continued survival as Public Enemy #1 showed the thugs and murderers of the world that there were limits to the strength of the United States military. In the words of Johnny Cash, "You can run on for a long time, sooner or later, God'll cut you down."

This look is triumph. And a little bit of agony. Mostly triumph!

Now, on the marathon side of things, I'm extremely pleased with how I did at the race yesterday. I made my share of rookie mistakes but I'll talk about that later. I have to give credit where credit is due, I hated every moment of hill training (even the downhill minutes, because they filled you with false hope) but it paid off in a big way for the Country Music Half Marathon. I actually didn't know that the hills had begun until they were almost over (my other coach, Sharon Perry, had to tell me that during the race). The only hill which was a bit daunting was the final ascent around mile 12. But I believe that was more a product of having run 12 miles than of the hill itself. The next big surprise was how well organized the finish line was. After I crossed the finish line, I was greeted by a person handing out medals, followed by a person handing out water bottles, and then a veritable grocery store of recovery snacks. I'm also pleased to announce that I beat the historic mark and was not half dead after the half marathon. I may have been 40% dead, but that's still better than half! I was also surprised by how much I recovered today. I certainly wasn't 100%, but I was able to move around all right and still managed to fit in a thirty minute bike ride today. . Even though my legs were killing me at the end, I couldn't help but smile as soon as I got my medal. Even now, it feels so unreal that I actually ran a half marathon.

The medal is so very, very cool.

Now onto the less good. I did make a series of rookie mistakes, but nothing was too crippling. First and foremost, I definitely got caught up in the adrenaline of the start of the race and ran faster than I normally would. My first mile was completed in 10:30 and I would finish with a pace of 12:20/mile. Nothing too bad, but I definitely was running at a pace I couldn't sustain. Next, I definitely should have used the bathroom right before the race even though I didn't feel like I needed it. Around mile six, I was reminded about the cost of being very well hydrated. Luckily, I'm a guy so all that I needed to take a bathroom break was a well located tree around mile 6. Unfortunately, the ladies had to wait in a line for a port-a-john that was at least 8 people deep. That detour only cost me a minute. The last mistake is a bit hard for me to pinpoint. This is because miles 8-12 have blurred together for me. I remember running them and seeing Sharon around Mile 9, but the exact locations escape me. But I digress. By this point, we had left dawn and were dealing with full-fledged day time. This meant less shade and higher temperatures on top of the fatigue of having run 8 miles already. My strict pace of run 9 minutes, walk 1 minute had slipped to run 8 minutes, walk 2 minutes. Then it slipped to 7 and 3. There was one stretch that was 6 and 4 due to a well placed series of water tables and the need to replenish electrolytes. It was hard to start running again at that point. But I didn't fold to the convenience of walking a mile or try to convince myself to rest and get back up to full strength. I persevered and I finished strong.

I sprinted all the way down the last hill and across the finish line. The easiest part of the half marathon was getting my medal right after the finish line. The hardest part was walking back to my ride. But all that is in the past now. Six months ago, I would never have thought I could do this. But now that it's over, I've achieved my goal and no one can take that away from me

Behold! The Bumper Sticker of Destiny! It was all worth it!

I did it.

I'm more than a little exhausted, so let me cut straight to the chase: I finished the half marathon in 2:42:25, which beat the goal I set for myself. I'll have pictures and more in-depth discussion tomorrow, but right now, I just want to sleep. But, as is my particular idiom, let me hit you with some random facts from the day before I go:

• Arriving at the half marathon was a truly surreal moment. I don't get nervous often, but I was blown away by the size of the race and the fact that I was actually there. Three months ago, the idea would have been too far fetched for me to dream of. But it actually happened.
• I made my share of rookie mistakes today, but nothing was too crippling. All in all, I figure it might have cost me five minutes total. I'm very pleased by that. Nobody's perfect, but it's always great to limit your mistakes.
• The one downside to the corral system of racing is that the slower people, more likely to be destroyed by the heat, have to run during the hotter part of the day. The only solution to this problem is to construct a weather control machine.
• I tried no less than four methods of electrolyte replenishment today (Gatorade, Shot Bloks, Gu Packets, and straight up Electrolyte Tablets). Tentative Ranking: 1. Shot Bloks 2. Gatorade 3. Gu Packets 4. Electrolyte Tablets.
• The finisher's medal for the half marathon is simply incredible. It actually feels like a trophy rather than a door prize.
• I didn't even notice the hilly sections of the race until the very last part. While I hated it, I have to admit, the merciless hill training really worked.
• I was surprised by how many people just walked the last three miles of the half marathon. I understand that is the point where exhaustion sets in and you just want to stop running. But when you were so close to the end , you just can't give up. That's what Cool Runnings teaches us. When your bobsled crashes, you get out and carry it across the finish line with the rest of the band of Jamaican misfits.
• True Story: Just as I was beginning the last hill, my iPod shuffled to the Rocky Theme (Gonna Fly Now by Bill Conti). Best. Shuffle. Ever.
• Most importantly, there was never any point during the race where I thought I couldn't finish.

Blogathon Day Five: Double Check

Two Brooks Ghost 3 Running Shoes: Check
Two Underamor Running Socks: Check
Track Shorts: Check
Blue Running Shirt: Check
Special Kids Singlet: Check
Two 10 oz bottles of Gatorade & Water Harness: Check
Four Shot Blok Electrolyte Cubes: Check
Three Electrolyte Tablets: Check
One Zone Bar: Check
Eight Fig Newtons: Check
Vaseline: Check
Race Number: Check
Timing Card: Check
Sunglasses: Check
Finisher's Medal: Pending

Blogathon Day One: And I Would Walk 500 More

We are underway for the 2011 Blogathon. For every ten dollars that you donate to Special Kids, I will make a new update on consecutive days. And there are a variety of other hilarious and humiliating things you can make me do while benefiting charity! Right now, the Blogathon is at Six Days long and counting.  Any donation you can make will be greatly appreciated. If I were more clever, I would design some type of banner to signify this event. But I digress. The Blogathon is spontaneously clever rather than clever in its strong planning and solid design.

Now, onto the main event. I figured I'd talk a while about how training went and how the good people at Team ASK were absolutely essential to my success. As I mentioned last time, running was not so much a hobby for me as it was my archenemy. I'd try taking it up from time to time, but it'd always end the same way: about three quarters of a mile of intense effort, followed by a quarter mile of seriously reevaluating my decision. In the months before signing up for the half marathon, I had taken up biking and loved it. While I was wrong about how much it helped, my skill at biking did a lot to convince me to try running. However, I'll talk about my motivations for running the half marathon another time.

My first Saturday run with Team ASK was a glorious, well intentioned disaster. I had gotten an awesome track suit at Belk's for under $20. It pays to wait until mid-February to get your winter apparel. I had my newish Nikes and had a lot of biking under my belt. I was convinced I would tear up the four mile run that my coach, Margaret Clark, had scheduled for that Saturday morning. I couldn't have been more wrong. As always, I got through the first three quarter miles just fine. And then the fourth quarter rolled around and I remembered just why every other attempt at running failed miserably. Typically, this would be where I started walking the rest of the way and declare it a moral victory. Fortunately, Margaret would have none of that. And this is where the insight started to roll in. Rather than just tell me to suck it up or run harder, Margaret gave me the first of three great pieces of advice that day: try running two minutes then walking one minute.

I Would Walk 500 Miles

My loyal (and, by definition, incredibly patient) readers know that I usually write about big events or other broad topics and that I generally don’t bother with the minutiae of my day to day life. One could argue that that defeats the purpose of a blog to begin with, but I say, “let awesome things be.” However, today I’m going to mix things up and talk about a major undertaking I’ve been working on for the past two and a half months. I have been training to run the Music City Half marathon with a lot of help from the good people of Team ASK (but more on them later).

Now, I’m usually the first to admit to being awesome but I’ve always been distinctly terrible at running. For me, the mile run in gym class always more closely resembled the Bataan Death March than Chariots of Fire. Even throughout college, I’d try to take up a treadmill every so often, but I’d always quit after around 15 minutes or so. The half marathon was about 11.1 miles longer than I had ever run in one go. So why did I agree to run one? First and foremost, I did it to get into better shape. It’s not that I ever looked particularly bad, but I was never happy with my shape either. Earlier in the year, my doctor had recommended I try running a half marathon and I routinely dismissed it as nigh on impossible. So part of my motivation was to spite Past Hunter. But an even bigger factor was that it would never be less difficult to train for and run a half marathon than it would right now. I’d get the bulk of my training done before the brutal heat of the six month Tennessee summer set in so I wouldn’t have to join a gym. And I wasn’t going to be busy with work or school. Unfortunately, I had always subscribed to the Barney Stinson philosophy of running a marathon (“First Step: Start running. There is no second step.”) and it had always let me down. I needed to find someone to train me.

Enter Team ASK. I could not have asked for a better group to train with than Team ASK (Athletes for Special Kids). They are a free marathon (and other long distances) training group based in Murfreesboro. It met my budget, was easy to reach, and would give me someone to be accountable to when running. And that is to say nothing of all the great advice and guidance my coaches, Sharon Perry and Margaret Clark, provided. But that’s a topic for another time. The only condition was that I help raise money for their charity, Special Kids. Fortunately, that’s no burden because Special Kids is a truly remarkable organization. They are a Christian group that focuses on the medical and rehabilitative care of children with special needs. To that end, they put a day care inside the same building as all the physical, occupational, and speech therapy a child needs. It means that children can get the care they need even if their parents can’t spend all day ferrying them from therapist to therapist. Better yet, Special Kids doesn’t turn children away because of money. They provide hope for children who would otherwise get lost in the shuffle of charities for more high profile diseases. So I got free training in exchange for helping children receive medical attention. I’d call that a good deal.



My child partner, Quinton.



Unfortunately, I’ve been so busy with running that I have not dedicated as much time as I should to fundraising. But I am a man of my word so I turn to you, loyal readers, for help. This site lets you donate money to Special Kids and help me reach my fundraising goal. It is tax deductible and now is a great time to get a jump start on next year’s refund. However, I believe that you should be getting as good a deal as I have. Which is why I’m proud to announce the English Muffin Power Hour Charity Extravaganza!

Any donations of any size during the Extravaganza is welcome. For every $10 that gets raised in total, I will update the blog daily. That means if we raise $100, that’s ten consecutive days of hilarious digressions, Top 5 Lists, and all the other features I write but never update. If we reach the fundraising goal, it will be a solid 70 days of consecutive updates.

But wait! It gets better. If you donate $20, I will write about whatever subject you want me to, in addition to getting two consecutive days of blog updates. If you donate $30, I will write you a song. I haven’t posted any of them here, but the people who have heard them have described my lyrics as “legendary.” If you donate $50, I will sing that song and upload the results to YouTube. For those of you who have never heard me sing, you should know that offer is a guarantee of  internet humiliation for me. For just half a Benjamin (or a full Ulysses), you can embarrass me anywhere there is internet access.

So please, give generously, both for the children in need and the abject hilarity/humiliation you can subject me to.